I think if you clear the shading on her face near the right side of the picture and move that shading instead to the left (the area that's black in the reference picture), it won't look like the face is trying to look directly at the camera. Also, when it's small, the shading of the hair one strand from the right side of the image kind of gets outshined by the rest of the hair near it (making it kind of look less round than it would be). Keep going! Look at the improvement from the first post.