Similar to my other project, Secret of Mana: Relocalized, Brave Story is going to be a re-interpretation of the existing English translations. Both the original and re-release, have huge problems. In most cases, Brave Story will find a compromise between it's original translator's script and Tom Slattery's rewrite.
I'm not going to go super fast. I'll probably drop a script for an event every couple days. The idea is to get feedback and criticism from the community. I'll be upfront though, this script will not be beholden to the nostalgic quirks of the original. Also, this draft is going to be rough.
Also, I want to give a special thanks up front to MostSeriousness who's script dump I shamelessly borrowed from Gamefaqs and Elric for letting me bend the rules of this forum for this post this.
[Princess Ovelia is praying inside Orbonne monastery. She is alone at the
altar while a female knight and a man in holy robes look after her.]
Ovelia: O Father, abandon not Your wayward children of Ivalice, but deliver us from our sins, that we might know salvation.
Agrias: Princess Ovelia, we need to go.
Ovelia (still kneeling): I'll not be much longer, Lady Agrias.
Agrias: Your escort has already arrived, Majesty.
Simon: Please, heed the good lady's words, Highness. You must hurry.
[The view rotates as three men walk through the front doors. A swordsman is clearly the leader of the three.]
Gafgarion: What's going on in here? It's been nearly an hour!
Agrias: Gafgarion, you forget yourself! You are in the presence of the princess!
[The two men behind Gafgarion, the swordsman, kneel instantly. Gafgarion remains standing, but bows his head.]
Gafgarion: Will this do, milady? Need I remind you that we don't have time for idle pleasantries?
Agrias: Tell me, has the Northern Sky sunk so low, as to allow vulgar knaves in its Order?
Gafgarion: I've been more than generous here, Guard Captain. We're mercenaries employed by the Northern Sky. We're not obliged to pay trivial courtesies to the likes of you.
Agrias: How dare you!
Ovelia (standing): Enough. Let us be on our way.
[The two men behind Gafgarion rise as Ovelia walks to address the robed man.]
Simon: Go with God.
Ovelia: And you, Bishop.
[A flash of lightning covers the screen as an injured female knight enters the
church. She limps towards the Princess. The Elder priest rushes to her aid.]
Knight: Lady Agrias! The enemy is upon us!
Simon: Duke Goltanna's men!?
[Agrias rushes outside without a moment's hesitation. Gafgarion addresses his
Gafgarion: The things we do for money... What's the matter Ramza? Afraid to get your hands dirty?
Ramza: I'm a no longer a knight. Just another sellsword like you.
Gafgarion: Right then. Let's go!
[The three men follow Agrias outside.]
Ovelia: Deliver us, O Lord...
A couple notes:
-Gafgarion uses idioms. It gives him a lowborn feel without requiring the highborn characters speak in WotL faux-Shakespearean.
-Ovelia's prayer is supposed to resemble something akin to the King James Bible. I intended for Ovelia and Agrias to a lesser degree to sound more highborn and hopefully their speech reflects that without going to far over the top.
-The Ivalician's are back to being primarily monotheistic. Tom Slattery has admitted that they were intended as such despite the fact that his script replaces many instances of God with gods and the rest with Father or Lord. I'm pretty sure Square Enix forced his hand on this one...
-Though it doesn't come up in this script I'll be using magic instead of magick in most instances. In this canon, words like Magick and Auracite are archaic words. As of right now, I intend to keep terms like this limited to archaic documents like Germonique's scriptures.
-Character names are basically going to be whatever I feel like has the better localization. Algus sounds more like a real name than Argath, so I'm going to use that. Olan will be Orlan, because duh. Vormav is staying. Draclau is updating to Delacroix, Queklain is Cúchulainn, and Velius is Belias. Again, these are names more accurate and I'm not beholden to nostalgia.
Again, I'm looking for feedback and criticism. I want to know what people think about my choices. I'm not going to have arguments though. I'm not interested spending more of my free time fighting people over nitpicks than I am working on this mod. I'm not very worried about this. FFHacktics is a great community with excellent people working behind the curtain.