FFT: PARADOY!!!

[Cyberblade]

Who would be interested in me writing a paradoy script for FFT and making a patch for it?

[DarthPaul]

i like the idea very much *cocks sniper pistol* whoever says no will be hunted down....i already got Voldemort and replaced him with a russian counterpart


bwahahahahahahahaa

[boomkick]

Hmm, i helped Voldemort out of his grave condition and now hes reading a label on the US rocket launcher "Aim at the enemy."

[samuchan]

Please insert lines from the "F*ck Yo couch" Chappelle Show sketch.

Or just have someone say "You ass! F*ck yo couch!"

[DarthPaul]

Hmm, i helped Voldemort out of his grave condition and now hes reading a label on the US rocket launcher "Aim at the enemy."

Boomkick guess what .....*sniped*

oh god why

[Cyberblade]

(ill patch it after i get the entire scrpt made but for now im gonna post here so you can have enjoyment of it.


God, You suck go
                  beat the **** out of some idiot.


Female Knight: Princess Ovelia, let's go.

Princess Ovelia: When im good and ready Agrias...

Agrias: The guards have already arrived.

Priest: Princess, don't give Agrias trouble. Please hurry...

Ovelia: Shut up you old fart. Im the Princess remember?

[A knight and two squires comes in from outside.]

Black Knight: What's going on? It's been nearly an hour!

Agrias: Don't be rude to the Princess, Gafgarion.

[The two squires behind the Black Knight kneels down while the
Black Knight simply bows his head.]

Gafgarion: Agrias if it was up to me id kill you. But this is an
urgent issue for us.

Agrias: So there are rude knaves even among the Hokuten?

Gafgarion: I'm being more than kind to the guard captains
here. Besides, we're mercenaries hired by the Hokuten. I'm not
obliged to show respect to you.

Agrias: What? How dare you!

[The princess stands up.]

Ovelia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Agrias you got BEAT.

[The two squires gets up on their feet. The princess walks
over to the priest.]

Priest: You are the weakest link, GOOD ****IN BYE.

Ovelia: {Give simon a middle finger.}

[A female knight walks in with a nasty wound. The priest helps
the knight.]

Female Knight: Lady Agrias!... The enemy!

Simon: Prince Goltana's men!?

[Agrias quickly rushes out the monastery.]

Gafgarion: What one must do to make money. What, Ramza? You
have a problem, too?

Ramza: ...I'm no longer a Knight. Just a mercenary like you.

Gafgarion: ...That's right. Well then. Let's go!

[The Knight and the two squires goes outside.]

Ovelia: ...*pulls out a gatling gun*


- Outside the monastery -
-------------------------

Agrias: The crest of the Black Lion!? What's wrong with Prince
Goltana!? He's such an idiot! Does he want to start a war!?

Goltana Knight: Knave! There's no point in resisting! Just
give us the Princess, or that beautiful face of yours will be
scarred forever!

[The black knight and the two squires comes out to help Agrias
and the others.]

Gafgarion: Fool! Only idiots attack head on!

[Agrias steps forward.]

Agrias: Leave this to us!

Gafgarion: We can't make money that way! Rad, Ramza! Follow
me!! Kill them all! Don't leave any survivors!

Agrias: Nonsense! There's no need to kill them! That's just
what Goltana wants us to do! Just let them go!

Gafgarion: That's impossible!

[Ovelia runs out massacring all of the enemy, then walk back inside. Then you hear her scream from the back.]

Ovelia: Let go of me!

[Agrias looks at the monastery.]

Agrias: Damn!!

[Agrias runs inside to save the princess. A knight takes the
princess through the back door of the monastery.]

Knight: Come here! Be quiet!!

Ovelia: Why should I listen to you!?

Knight: What an annoying Princess.

[The knight punches the princess on the stomach and puts her
on his chocobo. Agrias comes out.]

Agrias: Wait!!

Knight: Tough...Don't blame us. Blame yourself or God.

[The knight takes off with the princess. Agrias runs after the
knight, realizing she cannot keep up, she falls down on her
knees.]

Agrias: Oh, God......

[Ramza sees the knight.]

Ramza: ...Delita?? You're alive, Delita? But, why are you in
Goltana's troops? Why...? Extremly loud : WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!

[DarthPaul]

lol i love it man comic genius

[boomkick]

I wanna edit it just for my opinion. You don't have to change it at all, but i just felt like it.

[EDIT] changed some lines.

God, Go
                  beat the **** out of some idiot.


Female Knight: Princess Ovelia, let's go.

Princess Ovelia: Just shut up and wait.

Agrias: The guards have already arrived.

Priest: Princess, don't be a bitch. Please hurry...

Ovelia: Shut up you old fart. I'm the Princess remember?

[A knight and two squires comes in from outside.]

Black Knight: What the **** is taking so long.

Agrias: Don't be rude to the Princess, Gafgarion.

[The two squires behind the Black Knight kneels down while the
Black Knight simply bows his head.]

Gafgarion: Agrias if it was up to me I'd kill you. But this is an
urgent issue for us.

Agrias: So there are rude knaves even among the Hokuten?

Gafgarion: I'm being more than kind to the guard captains
here. Besides, we're mercenaries hired by the Hokuten. I'm not
obliged to show respect to you.

Agrias: What? How dare you!

[The princess stands up.]

Ovelia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Agrias you got BEAT.

[The two squires gets up on their feet. The princess walks
over to the priest.]

Priest: You are the weakest link, GOOD ****IN BYE.

Ovelia: {Give simon a middle finger.}

[A female knight walks in with a nasty wound. The priest helps
the knight.]

Female Knight: Lady Agrias!... The enemy!

Simon: Not another one... they always get hurt and come to ME!

[Agrias quickly rushes out the monastery.]

Gafgarion: What one must do to make money. What, Ramza? You
have a problem, too?

Ramza: Lets go beat the crap outta them!

Gafgarion: ...That's right. Well then. Let's go!

[The Knight and the two squires goes outside.]

Ovelia: ...*pulls out a gatling gun*


- Outside the monastery -
-------------------------

Agrias: The crest of the Black Lion!? What's wrong with Prince
Goltana!? He's such an idiot! Does he want to start a war!?

Goltana Knight: Knave! There's no point in resisting! Just
give us the Princess, or I'll run you through with my sharp thingy!

[The black knight and the two squires comes out to help Agrias
and the others.]

Gafgarion: Fool! Only idiots attack head on!

[Agrias steps forward.]

Agrias: Leave this to us!

Gafgarion: We can't make money that way! Rad, Ramza! Slice em', Dice em', And most importantly...KILL THEM! MUHAHAHA!

Agrias: Nonsense! There's no need to kill them! That's just
what Goltana wants us to do! Just let them go!

Gafgarion: That's NOT in the contract!

[Ovelia runs out massacring all of the enemy, then walk back inside. Then you hear her scream from the back.]

Ovelia: Let go of me!

[Agrias looks at the monastery.]

Agrias: Damn!!

[Agrias runs inside to save the princess. A knight takes the
princess through the back door of the monastery.]

Knight: Come here! Be quiet!!

Ovelia: DON'T RAPE ME! I BEG OF YOU!

Knight: What? Your too ugly to rape and shut up.

[The knight punches the princess on the stomach and puts her
on his chocobo. Agrias comes out.]

Agrias: Wait!!

Knight: Tough...Don't blame us. Blame yourself or God.

[The knight takes off with the princess. Agrias runs after the
knight, realizing she cannot keep up, she falls down on her
knees.]

Agrias: Oh, God......i blame you.

[Ramza sees the knight.]

Ramza: ...Delita?? You're alive, Delita? But, why are you in
Goltana's troops? Why...? Extremly loud : WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!![/quote]

[DarthPaul]

Not another one... they always get hurt and come to ME!

that made me lol

[Kokojo]

I think everyone should be consulted for that parody, here my idea (tell me if you want me to take it back)

[A female knight walks in with a nasty wound. The priest helps
the knight.]

Female Knight: Zomg, i got pwnzors !

Simon: Why the hell can't i use cure 2 now and send her to battle ?

[Agrias quickly rushes out the monastery.]

Gafgarion: Let's go see what happening, young lad.

Ramza: They will perish under a sea of blood !

Gafgarion: ...That's right. Well then. Let's go!

[The Knight and the two squires goes outside.]

Ovelia: Man, i forgot to cast them M-barrier.


- Outside the monastery -
-------------------------

Agrias:  Prince Goltana mens ?

Goltana Knight: Haha, we are here to take the princess, even such you overpower us with 2 holy knights, Goltana sent 5 of his weakest mans to take the princess. Wait a minute...

[The black knight and the two squires comes out to help Agrias
and the others.]

Gafgarion: Fool! Only idiots attack head on withouth planning that a old friend of a soldier in this batlle will capture the princess aftherwards !

[Agrias steps forward.]

Agrias: Leave this to us, they are fucking weak!

Gafgarion: Nah, i want to see their blood, BLOOD ! MUAHAHA

Agrias: You sick foul.

Gafgarion: RAMZA, RAD, LETS SLAUGHTER THEM

[Gafarion rapes the enemy with Blood river attack]

Ovelia: Hey, he's touching my breast !

[Agrias looks at the monastery.]

Agrias: Lol.

[Agrias runs inside to save the princess. A knight takes the
princess through the back door of the monastery.]

Knight: Man, i could just kill you then gve you a phenix down, why din't i think of that sooner ?

Ovelia: Please rape me !

Knight: Ew.

[The knight punches the princess on the stomach and puts her
on his chocobo. Agrias comes out.]

Agrias: Shit, why dont i statis him !

Knight: Don't blame me. Blame Canada.

[The knight takes off with the princess. Agrias runs after the
knight, realizing she cannot keep up, she falls down on her
knees.]

Agrias: Damn you, canada!

[Ramza sees the knight.]

Ramza: Meh, its my old friend.

[DarthPaul]

Damn you, canada!

i had the same idea for those two lines lol

[philsov]

Please insert lines from the "F*ck Yo couch" Chappelle Show sketch.

Or just have someone say "You ass! F*ck yo couch!"

Old photoshop, but:

[LastingDawn]

Poor Funeral... he always get the short end of the stick and is then not only stabbed in the chest, stabbed in the spine, he is then slapped in the face by a Heretic.

[Zozma]

lol use my idea

Ramza: I'm protecting Ovelia! Geronimo!!!

Ramza: I was going to attack the castle flank to save you, but why are you here?

Ovelia: We tried to escape but only Agrias was caught!

[DarthPaul]

why not have everyone including besridio pronounce mustadio's name wrong and have him get pissed at it

[Green Archer]

In the scene where Ramza, Beowulf and Reis (Dragon) are all on Nelveska Temple, Reis' Human sprite could be changed to a random male sprite (I am thinking, Aliste from the PSP version) to get some good 'ol fashioned Brokeback Mountain scene. LOL!!

It will turn out that Aliste and Beowulf had a thing going when they were still within the Lionel Gryphon Knights...

[DarthPaul]

????? THAT IS JUST SICK but i like it for the comedy value

[murak]

What about we try to make FFT styled Monty Python Sketches? I think Bastard Poetry's style of film making could be used to take bits and add effects to make something like a defence against fruit or a dead parrot sketch, for the Defence against fruit one, it could use the Gariland Academy where the Knight addresses the cadets as a base, then he could kill some of the squires and Ramza/delita could yell out that he's killing them, and instead of a tiger, it could either be a croul (can't spell T_T) or a Behemoth, good, bad?

[SentinalBlade]

murak... you just won 100 "Blade" pints by saying all that... monty python ftw

I whole heartedly agree

[DarthPaul]

and what are "Blade" pints anyway Sentinal