Honest oppinions..

[6divide9]

I wrote a few lyrics over a pretty basic beat about a half an hour ago. It is all very off the cuff and may be a little rough around the edges but I want your honest opinions because I know I can get many different perspectives on this board due to the large range of people who's oppinions I respect. Here goes:

the evidence is laid out
emotionless hiphop is a paradox
the nature of the neccesary
like sound to a speaker box
Feel the metaphor
Flow through you like ambrosia
Sweeter than life itself
Realise what I am showin ya

The fact of the matter is
for a matter of fact
as bleak as the latter is
music is always on track
a form of expression
used in some peoples eyes
as a way to live a lifestyle
garner their prize

This pulse pounding conflictive culture
has been sidelined by the need to determine the vulture
The need to suffer
to carry on with one another
in a cycle of viciousness that tries to be undercover

So peel your mind from my tapedeck
think about whats inside
predict the how and why
slice my lyrical pie
brian food for the common folk
diverse medium
you could say I am a thinker
I would tell you im breedin em

Tales of old tell us to be thankfull
we say why be thankfull when
we could have a bankfull
Of what
of ink on paper
no value to nature
just value to the hearts of those who believe in its might
A feeling that is closer to spite than contrite
a savage pull of the beast within that sells us short on our insight

The feelings that might surface aree the product of thought
gods gift to man
remember
we aren't the only race that he wrought
To take for granted what seperates
us from the masses
is the most mortal of sins
the most lethal of clashes
life is what we make of it
resides in the mind
an uncultured one is like a diamond with no facets
unmined

Stimulate and educate
cultivate freedom
to question or to postulate
is vital we need em
so refrain from the drain
and the rain of disdain
bred by insecurity
those who let the limits remian

break through the barriers like Berlin
find an open oyster to stick your pearl in
feel the knowledge pass like the breath of a whirlwind
let your mind be hurled in

[MagiTek v1.0]

That's pretty good, not "epic! it needs to be amde into a famous song!" good, but pretty good like "small band hit" type.

[Archael]

needs more weed

[Zalge]

NEEDS MORE COWBELL!!!1

[AngrySurprisedFace]

Needz moar jizz in pantz.

[Zalge]

... no. Your pants are far too full already.